Depression in Men: Why Therapy Is Key to Breaking the Silence
When it comes to depression, men often suffer in silence. They might not even realize they’re depressed—only that they’re more irritable than usual, more withdrawn, or more exhausted. They might throw themselves into work, zone out in front of a screen, or lash out at the people they care about.
And still, many don’t ask for help.
The truth is, men experience depression at similar rates to women, but they are much less likely to seek support. Cultural expectations about masculinity—being strong, stoic, and self-reliant—can keep men from recognizing their symptoms and reaching out. Therapy can offer a path forward. In fact, for many men, it's a life-changing experience that not only eases their depression but reconnects them to who they truly are.
How Depression Shows Up in Men
Depression doesn’t always look like sadness. Especially in men, it can show up as:
Increased irritability or anger
Withdrawing from friends and family
Fatigue or sleep disturbances
Loss of interest in work, hobbies, or sex
Risk-taking behaviors or substance use
Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
A sense of numbness, restlessness, or hopelessness
Men are also more likely to experience what renowned therapist Terry Real calls covert depression—a form of depression that doesn’t appear as obvious despair, but rather as disconnection, defensiveness, or emotional shutdown. In his book I Don’t Want to Talk About It, Real explores how many boys grow up learning that vulnerability is dangerous and emotions should be hidden. This emotional suppression, he explains, can eventually lead to depression masked by aggression, compulsive behaviors, or numbness.
The result? Men are hurting—but they don’t have the language or support to name what’s going on.
Why Men Don’t Seek Help
If you’re a man in Greeley, or if you care about one, you might recognize some of the common reasons men avoid therapy:
“I should be able to figure this out myself.”
The pressure to be self-reliant is strong—and often reinforced from a young age.“Talking about feelings just makes things worse.”
Many men have been taught that emotional expression is a weakness, not a strength.“I’m not the therapy type.”
Therapy is still often (and falsely) seen as something only for people who are “really struggling.”
But therapy isn’t about being broken. It’s about becoming more connected to yourself and the people around you. And for men, it can be an essential step in learning how to live with more authenticity, depth, and emotional freedom.
What Therapy Offers Men
Working with men in therapy is one of the most meaningful parts of my work here in Northern Colorado. It’s not about fixing anyone—it’s about helping people reconnect with themselves. Here’s how therapy can support men facing depression:
A judgment-free space to talk honestly, often for the first time, about what’s really going on
Language and tools to understand emotions that have long gone unnamed or unspoken
Skills to manage stress, relationship conflict, and anger without shutting down or blowing up
Relief from isolation, shame, or the pressure to constantly hold it together
Permission to be vulnerable—and discover that it’s a sign of courage, not weakness
As Terry Real puts it, healing begins with connection. When men learn how to be more emotionally present—with themselves and with others—they often experience a profound shift in their mood, relationships, and sense of purpose.
Changing the Story: A Greeley Perspective
At Greeley Counseling Services, we know how important it is to create a space where men feel safe, respected, and supported. You don’t have to show up with all the right words. You don’t need to be “in crisis.” You just need to be willing to take that first step.
In a community like Greeley, where resilience and hard work are part of our culture, it can be especially tough to ask for help. But reaching out isn’t a sign of failure—it’s a sign that you’re ready for something better. Whether you're navigating a difficult life transition, struggling with burnout, or feeling emotionally flat, therapy can help you reconnect with yourself—and the life you want to live.
From a Therapist’s Chair
Some of the most powerful moments I’ve witnessed in therapy have been when men finally let themselves be honest—not just with me, but with themselves. I've seen men go from silently carrying pain to speaking it out loud. I've seen the weight of shame begin to lift. I've seen them discover that vulnerability didn’t destroy them or make them less of a man—it opened the door to healing and being a stronger man than ever before.
If you’re tired of holding it all in, therapy can be a place to breathe again.
Let’s Talk—We’re Here When You’re Ready
If you or someone you love is facing depression, we’re here to help. At Greeley Counseling Services, we provide experienced, compassionate therapy for men who are ready to break the silence and start healing.
You don’t have to wait for things to get worse. Your story matters—and you deserve support.
